I write these weekly newsletters to reflect while developing my writing, storytelling, and marketing skills. My hope is to help others do the same.
I’ve done this for 78 weeks straight..
But I’ve been struggling to write the newsletter over the last month.
There could be a multitude of reasons for this. Spending time writing my 4th book. Looking for extra sources of income. Among other life changes.
So my motivation to write has dwindled.
When I pulled my phone towards me to lay down the first draft of this letter earlier in the week, I asked: “what’s the point anyway?”
But since I had a set process, I decided to spend a few minutes writing.
15 minutes later, I found motivation that pulled me out of my funk, not only for writing but just the rest of the day.
It reminded me that motivation is just the choice to show up to do what you said you’d do.
Having a system helps you show up easily.
No Motivation Today?
Most people expect to have constant motivation.
When we don’t feel motivated, we think there’s something wrong with us. Like we’re broken. This causes more demotivation. Down we go, into a spiraling rabbit hole of “it’s me. Something is wrong. Why can’t I just stay motivated.”
We do what most of us have learned to do, rely on external things to bring us happiness.
Retail therapy.
Social media binge.
Waiting for the inspiration fairy dust to land on us. But most times, these remedies are fleeting.
Eventually, you’ll find yourself back in the same situation.
Some of us pour ourselves into work. Our jobs give us a sense of purpose but we become so plugged in, addicted to slack responses and email threads, that we burnout. This makes the matter even worse.
Before you know it, you’re struggling to get out of bed. Thinking through each word your colleague said. Wavering and pandering, every day a foggy head.
Until everything loses meaning.
“Is this what life is all about?”
Motivation does not come to your door.
You have to seek it out and nurture it.
But it’s not something you can seek out in the world, you have to find it internally and nurture it. Because when you find true motivation, you’ll build on it. It makes the journey more enjoyable.
Motivation is not some vague thing that is reserved for a select few.
It’s available to everyone. You just have to remember that motivation itself is a choice.
Daily Motivation is Your Choice:
When next you are feeling demotivated try out this framework I’m about to share with you.
The simple reframe can help you get unstuck, nurture daily motivation, and give you the agency to live a more meaningful life.
Here are 6 steps to choose and build motivation:
1. The 3Cs of motivation:
Competence. Consequence. Choice
I learned this very interesting idea about how to think about motivation through curiosity. It all starts with these attributes and asking these questions:
- “Can I do it?” (Am I competent enough to get it done?)
- “Will it work?” (Will what I do be consequential?)
- “Is it worthwhile?” (Will it be worth my time?)
Whenever you are feeling unmotivated by your plans, ask these questions. It will help you think through it.
Let’s get into each one.
2. Competence (Stop planning, start being an expert):
You are not what you do.
A lot of us conflate our identity with what we do and our titles. True self-confidence comes when you detach your self-esteem from your ability to perform. In reality, anything you set your mind to, you can achieve it.
The real question is, are you patient enough to build competence.
It will not happen right out of the gate. You are not going tobe the best entrepreneur, artist, investor, engineer overnight. When you start building competence, there is a learning curve and it does not come with immediate gratification.
Build competence. Be patient.
3. Consequence (Focus on the compounding effect):
No one can predict the future.
I can’t even tell you what will happen by the end of the day. This reality can make you anxious. But it can also be liberating.
Everyone is figuring it out.
One thing that’s for sure is the compounding effect of consistently taking little steps.
If you wanted to lose weight and you spent 24 hours in a gym in one day, it would not be consequential. But if you spent 20 minutes, everyday, over 72 consecutive days, you would see improvements.
Stop over planning. Start becoming an expert at being consistent. Consequence is determined through the process of feedback.
4. Choice (Make it worthwhile):
Now we are getting to the crux of the matter.
This is the main question you have to ask yourself.
“Is it worthwhile and why?”
It’s clear you can build competence if you’re patient enough.
It’s clear that even though no one can predict the future, if you stick to an activity consistently, the compounding effect will eventually pay off.
The question really is: “is building competence and patiently waiting for the consequence worthwhile?”
And that’s the question you have to answer. The answer does not come once, it comes through consistent probing and reflection during the journey.
It’s the big picture that pulls you along, even when you’re down.
It’s the why.
This might not reveal itself immediately but you have to set aside time to nurture it.
5. Reflect:
Know thyself.
A lot of us want to do things, but we don’t even know why we’re driven to achieve.
I recently watched the movie “inside out” with my family and it’s a real examination of all the things that go on within us that spurs how we act. If you don’t take time to examine your thoughts and emotions, you will be driven by one thing today, pulled around by another thing tomorrow.
Not knowing why.
I find that journaling is a great way to reflect. Taking at least 5 minutes a day to write what’s on your mind.
Keep a journal to prove and remind yourself why you do what you do everyday.
This is an active choice you can make to nurture daily motivation.
Write to know thyself.
6. Systemize:
Develop systems.
One thing that has helped me stay consistent with the things I do like writing this newsletter or building my business and career is developing systems.
Having a set date to publish, using templates, writing at the same time everyday, making it easy to write on my phone, knowing the most convenient time to do an activity, scheduling that activity.
You will not feel the same everyday. You will not want to do what you have to do. But with a system, it gives you the guardrails to stick with the process.
The Fourth C…..
Lastly, motivation is found in building Community.
Motivating yourself is a choice. You can develop competence as long as you are patient. You can make anything you do consequential as long as you stick to it. You develop a sense of whether it’s worthwhile through reflection along the way.
All this is easier if you do it with like-minded people on the same path as you. Real motivation comes as a choice to serve with your community.
You might have to find and build this community.
Just remember, you can do it.
Be patient.
Yours truly, Nifemi
P.S. If you read this far, reply with one thing that this newsletter made you think about.
